Control Freak Responds
A reply to our posting of an amazing display of buffoonery in four emails
(editorially riffed by Jadesyren and Nataliep)
From: Slimey Prick
Date: Mon, 11 Jun 2001
I just had quiet moment yesterday and checked your site and had an interesting surprise.
[He just can't stay away. Another demonstration of the moronic irony that dogs this guy's life.]
Amongst the usual barrage there was a
sequence of letters from a control freak you cleaverly called
"Slimey Prick". Could that possibly be me?
[Stupid question. Didn't it LOOK familiar?]
Anyway, I found alot of what you said very funny and really laugh at
the stereotype you've created.
[We didn't create it... HE did. We're not the map, we're the compass.]
But at the same time I have to
wonder if you know what you're talking about; are you aware how hurtful
it is to call a man's wife a "parasite" on an internet
[Wah. Wah. Wah. Notice how he doesn't say anything about "calling a person" a parasite - no,
it's all about HIS upset because he perceives someone insulted his prize possession - "a MAN'S wife"...besides, if being his wife didn't
hurt, then this shouldn't. (Note to Slimey: look up the definition of "parasite" sometime.)]
I consider anything you've said about me as fair game, I
wrote the letters and gave as much as I recieved;
[Not by a long shot. Do we write any letters to HIM, except in response? ]
but to attack my wife personally is wrong (you didn't do this in the origional letters).
[And WHO dragged her into this? Now he's hiding behind his wife's apron.
(since we kicked the shit out of the "daughter as shield" defense).]
She is not a parasite, she has a degree, has alot of self respect,
[Yep. So much self respect that she married a guy who values her appearance above all else.
The kind of guy who complains to a total stranger about "christ knows how many beauty products" he
is shelling out for, because he expects her to "look good". Yep. Ooodles of self-respect there bub.]
is a good mother and in my opinion showed an immense amount of courage and
self confidence when she shrugged aside the smart-ass coments she gets
from people like you and married an older man.
[*Snork* Courage? To latch onto an older guy whom she figured she could manipulate into taking care of her?
Nah. That's lazy. Courage is being the chief prosecutor at the UN War crimes tribunal. Courage is running for
public office. Courage is starting your own company. Getting married to some old
geezer doesn't take courage - it's an age-old cop-out path. She's chosen to make herself into a stereotype.]
You assume so much about her, yet you have never met her and have probably met very few
women like her.
[The very fact that she married and spawned progeny with the likes of HIM, *and* the way he speaks about her
when he's not being "careful", speaks VOLUMES about her character. And of course, the fact that she won't speak
for herself tells us plenty as well. Courage? *doublesnort*]
You probably just give women like her a
patronising smile whilst you assume the attractive blonde is just
another dumb bimbo, and probably think they don't notice.
Well they do, whenever we enter a restaurant we count just how many
"independant women" give Louise the "look",
[Heartless reply: Who cares what dumb blondes think?
Look at this stereotype, and it's a stinker based on beauty assumption.
Other women don't look at her with disdain because she's beautiful. It's because she's
prostituted herself. She just happens to be beautiful, which has allowed
her to market herself in that manner.]
interestingly the men give a completely different look.
[I'll bet they do. Neither is the look we'd be giving. We'd be laughing.]
You should try being a little more broad minded,
[He's "broad" minded enough for all of us. In his world, there are only three stereotypes: Men, ugly, jealous women,
and "smart" (read:attractive) women.]
just try talking to and
understanding people before you place them in a category and insult them
on the basis of that category.
[That finger points back at him. He's missed everything we've said.]
Having said that I do accept that I am guilty of having a largely and
irrational dislike of certain people,
[... but he doesn't "stereotype" them...]
but I don't tend to express that dislike publically over the internet.
[Except to send email (over the internet, moron) flagrantly patriarchal and sexist comments to total strangers, at websites that publish their "all email is subject to being posted on this site" policies...]
I did ask that the letters not be published, and I assumed when you responded you had accepted that request.
[I guess he didn't bother to read the disclaimer.]
Obviously that is not so, and I would therefore request that you take the messages down.
P.S. You disapoint me, I thought you were an interesting and intelligent women who held vastly different opinions about the world, I was wrong. On the basis of what you've put on your web site you really are a bitch.
[Oh. My. God. He just called me a BITCH! Whatever will I DO?
Just when you think he can't get any more LAME, he attempts to hurl the infamous "BITCH" insult.
AS IF. What part of "Heartless Bitches International" did he fail to clue in on? All of it, apparently. This is just too rich.]
BUT WAIT... It gets BETTER. No reply was sent to the above letter. We just sent it around to the SAMOTURE and posted it to the discussion forum and had a good laugh about it.
and then THIS arrives:
From: "Slimey Prick"
Date sent: Sun, 17 Jun 2001
I am working in the US at the moment (which yoiu will undoubtablky pick up from my email) and have just quickly checked your site. I can't find the bit where you insult my family, so thanks for taking it down quickly.
[It seems he is just about as computer illiterate as his wife, and BLIND to boot. Seems their 5-yr-old is more adept at using technology than her parents. She MUST have been adopted.]
Hopefully one day you girls will see the light, but I enjoyed the argument
[Ah Slimey, patronizing as ever. We enjoyed laughing at you and the ease with which you repeatedly stuck your foot in your mouth, all the while protesting that it was somebody else's foot!
Truly a classic.]